Contemporary UK Story: The Visitor

This story was inspired by people I knew who as students met the person they were going to marry and stay with for years, in the first few weeks of their courses.  In addition, I have come across a number of true stories of women who were sexually attracted to a female friends and only decades later found out that the feeling had been mutual, but neither had said anything at the time.  It also aims to show that even some mild hypnosis can have a massive impact on someone’s life.  Consequently this story is more romantic and lighter touch than many of mine.

The Visitor

Jessica lugged her suitcase through the door and closed it behind her.  Bringing it here from the bus stop felt as if she had dragged it five miles.  However, she guessed that she should be grateful that the job was done.  Her university room looked as much as when she had left it; though the bin had been emptied.  Pinned to her cork board were all the flyers about Christmas events and even some to celebrate the new millennium.  In the end, her New Year, taking her into the twenty-first century, had been spent not watching the fireworks in London but sat around the television with her family.  She wondered if she should have taken up Anabelle’s suggestion that they meet up in London, but worries about getting pick-pocketed or being stranded with no way to get home, meant she had gone for the safer option.

Slumping down in her desk chair to catch her breath, Jessica glanced out of the window.  The campus was hardly an inspiring sight.  Pinpoints of light from other rooms and along the pathways were clear against the dreary sky.  She guessed this was always the situation after New Year and the decorations had been brought down.  She wondered why she had expected something different.  Maybe she had simply fallen victim to the hype around the millennium and somehow had expected to wake up into a changed world rather than the same one with simply different numbers of the dates.

Jessica sought to stir herself: there would be work to be done, essays to write and if she simply wallowed in January blues, she guessed she would find herself falling behind.  She had only been at university a term, and it still seemed to be a challenge to get herself into the right frame of mind.  This term, she reasserted, she would change that.  Not only would she work harder but she would make an effort to socialise a bit more; get beyond just the circle of friends, acquaintances really, who shared the kitchen.  Maybe she should follow what Megan had suggested and join her church group.  Jessica was not particularly religious; her family had not attended church since she was at nursery school.  However, she felt that she might get on better off with people like that rather than slipping into drunken evenings out with course-mates like Anabelle and Kumari,

“Jez.”

For a moment Jessica did not know if she had heard the voice or it had been something in her own head.  She never shortened her name.  Anyway, it was not a contraction she would have used nor anyone around her, perhaps except Anabelle, Josh or Kumari.  Maybe the train journey back and the bus ride had taken more out of her than she had imagined and her mind was wandering.  Perhaps, now that all the excitement was over, flu or simply a cold was creeping up on her.  She told herself she needed to get an early night.

“Jez.”

The call was repeated.  This time it was accompanied by a gentle touch to her shoulder.  Jessica yelped and jumped up in surprise, her heart pounding.  As she turned, backing up against the window she saw a woman sat on her bed.  She was puffing on a cylinder tipped by a blue light which exuded something that looked like thick water vapour.

“Sorry, a bad habit, but it helps me relax when I am doing something like this.”

Jessica wondered if the woman was drunk or on drugs, perhaps both.  Had she stumbled into the wrong room or come here intentionally?  She trusted her fellow students in the hall and did not usually lock her door, especially when she was in the room.  Fortunately, for the moment there seemed to be no malice from the woman, but it might be that she was simply hiding from campus security staff.  She trusted that she could talk the woman round into leaving.

Looking at the stranger, Jessica guessed that the woman was a little older than her mother, perhaps in her fifties.  However, she was dressed in a style of a much younger woman.  She had on a short leather jacket which was something like a replica of a biker jacket but lighter.  It lacked seams, as if it had somehow been ‘grown’ as a single piece of leather.  Beneath was a sleeveless maroon top.  She wore black jeans that looked impossibly tight and had shiny ribbed strips down the outer edge.  The boots again looked like a fashion version of what a biker might wear; detailed with studs.  Her hair was cropped in a smart pageboy style and she wore glasses with black, rectangular frames.  Was this woman the mother or the aunt of one of the other residents of this hall?  Was she perhaps, an academic?  The clothing suggested that might be the case; Jessica knew they often went in for unusual fashions.

“Go on: ask me who I am and how I got in here.”  The woman prompted.

Those had been Jessica’s initial thoughts, but she had held back from voicing them, realising that she felt a little intimidated by this woman.

“You are beautiful, Jez; my memories do not lie.”  The woman observed as if someone had told her to expect something different.

The statement threw up so many questions for Jessica.  She wondered if she had actually met this woman before, perhaps at the start of last term when various relatives had been around helping students move in.  However, that thought was quickly overwhelmed by her taking in that she had been described as ‘beautiful’ and by a woman.  Jessica blushed, adding to her unease.

“I am …, no I am not going to apologise, that would undermine why I am here.  Jez, you are beautiful, never forget that, and in so many ways, not just physical; you are so caring, so tolerant, such a good laugh …”  The woman trailed off as if there were too many attributes to cover.

Jessica did not know why this woman felt the need to compliment her and in such ways.  She hardly considered herself caring or tolerant or even a good laugh; as for being physically beautiful, she knew that was a lie.  Was this woman some kind of confidence coach?  Was she someone from Megan’s group sent along to cheer up Jessica?  She knew that some churchgoers, especially those in ‘outreach’ deliberately tried to be trendy, but this woman went beyond her expectations.  Wondering how to respond, she looked more at the woman.  She noted the rows of silver rings in her ears; the stud in the side of her nose; the rings on her fingers; the tendrils of tattoos reaching out from beneath her leather sleeves and the twirling tattoo down the outside of her left palm.  If this woman was reaching out, it seemed more likely to be for a biker gang than a church.

“Who are you?”  Jessica asked at last, now that her curiosity had been fully awoken.

“I’m Ana Poitiers; your wife.”

The woman held up her hand and tapped the band on her ring finger.  It was white gold and Jessica found she was a little jealous, she had always wanted a white gold ring and this one seemed studded with small amethysts, her favourite stones.

“My wife?”  That response seemed ridiculous to Jessica.  “I am a woman, we can’t get married.”

“Not yet, we can’t; but in the future.”

“So you come from the future in which we have got married?”  Jessica scoffed.

“You’ve got it in one.”

Now Jessica wondered at the sanity of this woman.  Then she began to speculate if this was some kind of game or maybe an alternative theatre production; perhaps a piece of performance art.  All those things went on at universities, she knew.  Maybe a group had picked on her as a suitable audience or participant.  Maybe Josh or Satoshi had set them up to do it.

“If that is the case, then I think you’ve got the wrong woman.”  Jessica said, feeling clever in playing along.  “I don’t fancy women, so I am hardly likely to marry one even if it did become the law.  Or is this about getting a residency or something legal like that?”

“No, we’re both British, though we end up living in France.  The reason why we marry is because we are in love.”

“But you’re what?  Thirty; forty years older than me?”

Ana chuckled.  “No, we are the same age when we marry.  For you that is in the future but for me it was three years ago.”

“So, let’s say you are right: both that you have come from the future and that you have the right woman - why do I suddenly decide I fancy women?”

“It’s not sudden and that is the problem.  I pine for you for years.  I head off to Berlin and you end up in the USA and Australia and then back here, wondering why you cannot settle; why you cannot make a relationship work with a man the way you are supposed to make it work.  You are a late bloomer, it takes you thirty years to realise what you passed up on now; even more than that – were even too scared to consider.”

For a moment Jessica felt irritated.  Now she realised that perhaps she should have realised that this was not a woman come to convert her to any religion, just to make her think she should be a lesbian.  Was that allowed?

“I am sorry, I am not interested.  I don’t know who suggested that I might be someone suitable for you to talk to me …”

“It was you, Jez.”

Now Jessica wondered if this was something she had done when drunk.  Had she somehow said she fancied women or had someone thought that was what she had said, then called up Lesbians ‘R’ Us to come to confirm it?  Now Jessica felt guilty.

“Hold on, don’t get yourself stressed.”  Ana held up her hand.  “Let me show you something.”

Ana reached into her back pocket and pulled out something in purple leather case.  It was the size of a mobile phone, but far thinner and as Ana opened it, Jessica saw it had no buttons, simply a screen.  Ana tapped on it and swiped across it.  Then, holding the screen in landscape orientation, turned it to face Jessica.

“Hello me!” 

A woman, probably much the same age as Ana, appeared on the screen.  She wore a capped-sleeve purple teeshirt; her hair was a similar shade to Jessica’s own, but long on one side and cropped back on the other.  She held up the cuddly toy dog that looked like the one Jessica had had as a child and was probably still in a cupboard at home.

“Remember Mr. Dee?”  The woman asked.

Jessica felt a chill - it had been the name of her toy.  Once more she felt indignation mixed with bewilderment.  This seemed to be a very complex trick; perhaps one designed to drive her mad.

“And your guilty pleasures: Perez Prado?  ‘Cruel Intentions’?  The X-Factor.”  The woman asked.

The footage on the phone, or whatever this was, looked flawless.  Jessica felt embarrassed to admit she had enjoyed dancing to the naff old tune and no-one else seemed to like that movie.  ‘The X-Factor’ – she had no idea what that was.

“Maybe I’ve misremembered some of them.  I am sure, though, that you remember Mossland; that must have only been a couple of years back and, of course, very important, Angmering Beach.”

Now Jessica felt truly unsettled.  These were secret things she had never told anyone.  Mossland had been the mental space she had created a couple of years back to retreat into when stressed by her exams.  Angmering Beach had been where she had briefly kissed a girl of her own age when there on a daytrip.  That she had buried from everyone.  It was impossible that this woman could know those things.

“I am you, Jessica Fielding; though since my marriage, I am Jez Poitiers.”  She held up her hand to show a matching ring to Ana’s.  “We took the same name, me – you and my wife; remember Eleanor of Aquitaine was from the House of Poitiers.”  Jessica knew it.

Now the woman turned side on to whatever camera had recorded this.  Her bare arms were tattooed like Ana’s, but there was a difference.  Just below the left shoulder, this Jez’s designs encompassed a purple birthmark as if it was a plum.  Self-consciously Jessica’s fingers went to that birthmark on her own arm, but in her case concealed beneath a coat, jersey and blouse.

“This is my – your wonderful wife, finally.”

Jez gestured to the camera and Ana emerged looking pretty much as she did now.  The two women kissed deeply and Jessica shuddered as she had a flashback to Angmering and running in panic from the café.  This time she could not look away.  The two now turned to face the camera and smiled broadly.  Jessica could tell, even when unfamiliar with lesbian couples, that these two were clearly happy; presumably in love.

“Please listen to what Ana has to say.  Do not deny you, me – this - for thirty years; life is too short for such a delay and you’ll love Berlin so much more than Chesapeake.”

The two women kissed again.

“Oh yes, and if you don’t get what this is all about, I know in those days I could really lie to myself about stuff, please recognise that, around the millennium I was, I definitely was you – Jessica Fielding and this was Anabelle Chadwick.”

The two women blew kisses to the camera and then the picture went black.  Jessica staggered a little, feeling hot and dizzy.  Could that really have been a message from her in the future?  That seemed impossible.  Yet then again, how did that woman look like her of the future and know things she felt sure she had shared with no-one?

“Do you want to see it again?”  Ana asked.

Dimly Jessica shook her head.

“So you’re … you’re Annabelle, but from thirty years from now?  Have you spoken to her; you?”

“No, it would add nothing.  She, I, know I am attracted to you and am optimistic that you feel something similar and one evening we will find out that it’s mutual.  I’m no expert at this myself.  You’d be only my second real girlfriend anyway.  However, maybe I am a fool holding on for so long; turning down other offers certainly until you go to the US, four years from now.”

“Then why don’t you go and tell yourself …”  Jessica felt it sounded mad; that she had let herself slip into these women’s way of speaking, “to give up on me and find someone else?”

Ana tapped the wedding ring.  “Three years of brilliant marriage and the romance that went before.  I was right back then … back now.  There is something different about you; something different about you and me - together.”

“But maybe experience is what makes me like you; and you, me.  Maybe we need that time apart.”

Jessica felt hit by that, because she realised she was admitting that she would end up with Anabelle anyway.  That would mean that how she saw things now was as much a fantasy as a woman who could travel through time, it seemed, only with the benefit of an electronic cigarette and a mobile phone.

“Well, that is the gamble I am taking.  If I am wrong, then I may be destroying my marriage in the future.  I am willing to gamble that for bringing happiness to you and to me, decades before it will happen, otherwise.”

“Yes, but what if I think I am mad or swear off women and men and go to a nunnery?”

Ana shrugged.  “It is a risk, but knowing you so well, I think I have better odds than you might be imagining.”

Jessica was unhappy at the fact that these women seemed to know her better than she did; maybe that attitude came with age.

“Well, at the moment, you’ve done nothing to get me to change my mind or if you have, it will be away from Anabelle and anything resembling lesbianism.  Did you not think how you might totally freak me out?  Did you really think a message from future-me would change my mind?”

Ana shook her head.  “No, there is something else.”

“What?  You are going to brain wash me?  No-one can be made into a lesbian, you do know that.  Or have they also invented some mind-changing device you can carry in your pocket, thirty years from now?”

As she said it, Jessica imagined that if they had cracked time travel then such a device would not be beyond them.

Ana shook her head again.  “No.  Why would I do something like that to the woman I love?  Think about what risk that would mean to my wife.  Think it through.  I know you are so intelligent, you just get flustered and make bad decisions that you sort of regret later.  Let’s slow this up.  Sit down.  Take off your coat.”

Jessica felt that she should shout this woman out of the room.  However, she recognised that she had identified that a tendency that Jessica had come to notice in herself.  She was feeling incredibly hot, so took off her coat and then the jersey.  She then sat down and faced Ana feeling that this was the mature way to handle the situation even if it was a hallucination.  As she looked at this Ana she began to notice characteristics that she knew from Anabelle, though, unsurprisingly, altered by the passage of time.  Jessica realised too, that unless this was one massive hallucination or dream, then perhaps she now knew a secret about Anabelle that, as far as she knew, she had not revealed to anyone here.  Jessica could not recall her friend creeping off to attend LGBT club meetings.  She guessed that, if any of this proved to be true, she would have to be careful not to out her friend, whether deliberately or inadvertently; it was the least she could do.

“Good.  That is better.”  Ana smiled.

“So if there is no device, what are you going to do to show me the error of my ways?”  Jessica asked with flippancy covering unease and a little irritation.

“Hypnosis.”  Ana said quietly.

“Ah, so maybe not a device, but simply old fashioned hypnosis to turn me into a raving lesbian.”

“No, of course not.  You are a lesbian.  That is not the issue.  This is about confidence.  Having confidence in your feelings; exploring them and not picking the opposite route all the time just because you can.  In many ways you are your own worst enemy and not simply in terms of your sexuality.  Do you think Megan’s group will make you feel better?  Happy?  You seem to love penance.  It seems to give you a buzz to deny yourself even something that does not give you pleasure, but simply contentment.  It will take years and a lot of heartache to shake off such guilt.  Your body and mind do not lie to you, Jez; it is simply you deny the truths that they tell you.”

“Okay, okay.”  Jessica responded.  “This is all sounding rather philosophical.”

However, though she would not confess it, Jessica recognised what Ana was saying was astute.  “What are you going to change?”  She asked with some impatience.

“Relax, that is one thing you need to do much more of.  Ironically it will mean you’ll do better in your studies.  You need to slow up; listen to the signals coming through and then have courage to act on them, even if they unsettle you.  Excitement, of course, is a form of being unsettled, but rather than ride the thrill, you bury it.”

“So you want to switch those things off in me?”

Jessica found that, surprisingly, to think she might be changed gave her a little frisson.

“Yes, just little things.  There’s no desire to make you reckless; a drop-out; just to give a chance to realise now who you truly are, rather than only finding that out many, many years from now.”

Jessica still wondered if this woman was lying to her; seeking to trick her into something.  However, she had to admit that nothing Ana had said, even if it sounded incredible at times, had come across as a lie.  Jessica had no belief that she could be hypnotised, nor that anyone could alter fundamental characteristics within a person.  She supposed, however, that if she played along, this woman would go away satisfied and leave her alone.  If nothing, she might have a great plot for a short story.

“Okay.  I accept what you are saying.  What do I do?”

Ana smiled and stood up from the bed.  “Let’s swap places.”

Jessica agreed, actually enjoying lying back on the bed.  Ana reached down as if to adjust the duvet but in fact gently brush her hand across Jessica’s cheek and then she smiled softly.  Jessica gave a shudder, believing that what she had just felt was a genuine loving touch.  Could you love someone so entirely that any day in their life was special to you?  She guessed these elderly couples she sometimes saw, might suggest it was possible.  Certainly it would be a strong motive for a stunt like this.  The Jessica realised, that the touch had shown that this Ana could not be a hallucination; she was as real as this bed or the chair or the window.

Ana seemed to notice new concerns threatening to tax Jessica.  “Relax.”  She repeated softly.

Jessica did not know if it was the weariness from the journey or all the fantastical things she had witnessed since entering the room, but she seemed to sink quickly into a warm state in which everything seemed distant.  Suddenly she realised that Ana had been speaking but she had not been listening.

“That is it, deeper and deeper, you feel yourself drifting away but your entire focus is on what you can hear.  The words come into you softly and they sound like your own words; they are your own words; important words, good words, words you want to understand and when the time comes to act on.  Nod, if you understand Jez … Jessica.”

Jessica found herself nodding, though it was too much effort to speak.

“That’s good Jess-ica.  You must listen to yourself.  Listen to your mind; listen to your body.  They keep sending you messages; they’re looking out for you, so don’t be all stubborn and do the opposite, you know that will make you unhappy.  Go with what your mind and body tell you are good things to do; fun things to do; exciting things to do; thrilling things to do.  They’ll do you no wrong.  Trust your instincts, don’t fight them every time.”

“Now, if you are listening to your body and mind, Jessica, you will know you are beautiful, you know you are beautiful.  That’s not in an arrogant way, nothing to boast about, but in a way that you like yourself, you like your beauty, so you accept that other people like your beauty.  It’s not just the beauty of your face, of your body, it’s a beauty of you – your manner, your politeness, your concerns for others, your tolerance, your loyalty down the years; they’re all beautiful things about you.”

“Jessica you’re a woman who listens to what her body is saying, what her mind is saying; you know you are beautiful, so it’s no surprise that you’re confident.  Again, not arrogant, not stubborn, just confident in your decisions; confident in how you appear to other people; confident when people say they like you; say they love you - that you can tell when it is the truth.  And if someone likes you, think about how you feel about them.  Your mind and body will tell you.  If someone loves you, think about how you feel about them.  Again, your mind and body tells you.  Ignore fear and prejudice and worry, they’ve got nothing worthwhile to say.”

“A confident, beautiful woman, well, surely she’s going to be sexy.  You’re not a girl any longer, but a woman, confident in her sexuality.  You love sex with a person who loves you.  You like to dress, to appear in a way they find appealing, which makes you feel sexy in yourself.  You are open to styles which work in that way; experiment, try clothes, jewellery, hairstyles that make you and your partner feel good.  Then you’ll both be happy.”

****

Jessica came awake feeling incredibly refreshed.  She opened her eyes and saw the back of a woman in a black leather jacket and tight jeans.  It took some moments for Jessica to recall who this was and what had happened.  She heard sounds of panting and gasping and then as she focused she saw that the woman had a small screen held out in front of her.  Quietly, Jessica sat up and could now see that it showed two women in the throes of passion.  As one slid her head between the thighs of the other, Jessica caught sight of the birthmark encircled by the tendrils of the tattoo that told her this erotic scene showed her of the future.  Jessica shuddered pleasurably.  For a moment she felt it was impossible that she could be that sexual, but that idea disappeared in an instant.  Jessica knew she was a woman and a beautiful, sexy one at that.  If going down on a woman excited her, then why should she not do it?  As she thought that through, she felt the subtle hints of arousal creeping on to her and she let it come.

“It’s worked.  It’s not changed.”

Jessica heard Ana say to herself, it seemed contradictory.  However, if everything this woman had said was true, then it seemed she was confirming that the footage of her and Jez making love had remained the same, showing that what she had attempted here had done nothing to damage that future.  Jessica felt pleased for Ana that her gamble had paid off.

Ana turned to Jessica and smiled broadly.

“Now it is up to you.  See you in thirty years.”  She blew a kiss.

Jessica readied to say something but in that moment Ana was gone.  Had it actually been a hallucination?  Could she imagine a touch?  So many things suggested it had not been an illusion but something.  Yet, if it was true, surely it had to be impossible.  Was that not impossible itself?  Jessica felt she could not entangle it all.  A knock at her door took her from these thoughts.  She jumped up and went to the door, half expecting Anabelle but it was Megan.

“Jessica.  Hello, you’re back.  Just in time.  We’ve got a Crossroads Group meeting.  Get your coat on.”

In a flash Jessica had a vision of traipsing through a rainy evening to a cold and dull room where she would be challenged for the next couple of hours about why she knew so little of the scriptures and about the way she lived her life.  It did not seem like something that was going to make her content, let alone happy.

“Megan, sorry, but I’ve had a long journey.  I need to rest.  I’ve had a good think about my life and I feel now, well, I do not need the kind of support you’re offering.  Thanks for the thought.”

Megan stood there with her head at an angle as if criticising Jessica by her very stance.  Jessica was tempted for a second to yield and tell Megan that she was right and that she should get a move on to the meeting.  Instead, she smiled and closed the door.  She felt in the mood to change into something a little sexier than her travelling clothes and was soon in her low-rise jeans; that long-sleeved teeshirt with the swirling pattern on it and her new DM boots in dark red, bought with the vague idea of going to a festival.  In seconds, that became a determination to go to a festival in them.  In moments she found herself out of her room, pleased Megan was not still standing there.  Jessica was quickly at Anabelle’s room and noticed light coming from beneath the door; she knocked.

Anabelle opened and smiled when she saw Jessica.

“Welcome back.”

“Glad to be back.”  Jessica responded, surprised how buoyant she sounded.

“Come in.”

“I will.”

Inside, Jessica closed for an air kiss and quickly became conscious of how good Anabelle smelt.  A little self-consciously, she sat on the bed; Anabelle sat opposite on the soft chair.

“So how was Christmas?”  Jessica asked.

Anabelle shrugged.  They made vague conversation about what they had been up to.

“Did you get to London?”  Jessica asked.

“Sure did.  You missed a great one.”

“Yes, so I understand, I feel gutted.  Look, I make a promise now, I’ll go next year, if you are still interested.  It won’t be as big, but you know … might be good.”

“Yes, sure, that would be good.  I think you would have enjoyed it.”

“I am beginning to think that I would, Ana …” Jessica halted as she realised she had made the switch.  “Sorry, you don’t mind me calling you Ana?”

Anabelle smiled.  “No I prefer it.”

“Good.  Well, drop the Jessica, you can call me Jez.”  It came out before Jessica could stop herself, but she felt pleased that it had.

“Jez.”  Anabelle responded as if trying it out.  “Jez,” she laughed, “I’m loving the boots.”

“Thanks.  I thought you might.  I er … I put them on for … well, for you.”

Jessica realised that that was a confession she had not intended; indeed had only just realised herself.

“Oh God.”  Jessica said.  “Look, I’m not doing very well, so please forgive me.  I think I’m building up to saying some stuff.  Some things have become clearer for me recently … very recently and well, I needed to talk them over … over with you.”

“Okay.”  Anabelle responded sounding both hesitant and curious.

“Ana – erm, do you think I am beautiful?  No, sorry, that is wrong, sorry, really arrogant; sounding like I’ve got image problems.”

“You are beautiful, Jess – Jez.”

“You’re not just saying that?  To make me feel good?”

“No, it’s true.”

“Right, well, then I need to say: I think you’re beautiful.”

In that moment, Jessica knew that her words truly reflected what she was thinking.  She cursed the fact that she had never realised how attractive she had always found her friend.

“Can I say I think you look sexy?”  Jessica continued.

Now Anabelle smirked.  “If you like.  You’re sexy too, that I can say with no doubt.”

“I was thinking, well, I had an idea that I might get my nose; no, I will get a stud in my nose.”  Jessica said knowing it would happen sooner or later, but feeling that if it was sooner she would like it better.  “I was wondering if you’d come with me; hold my hand.”

“Sure.”

Anabelle stood up and went over to the small jewellery box on her desk.  She opened it and in the next few moments removed the small stud from her own nose and put in a silver ring.  She turned and looked at Jessica.  She wondered if Anabelle was looking to advance this discussion to where she wanted it to turn.  Jessica wondered if she had the courage to go there herself.

“Sorry, I have no idea why I did that.”  Anabelle apologised.  “I guess … well, here you know, I thought I was going to be free to be what I wanted to be.  Everyone says that you ‘find yourself’ at university.  However, instead, everyone here seems to want to tell you how you should live and even how you should behave.  I feel less like me than before I got here.  I worried that you were going to become like that; I saw you becoming friends with Megan.  However, I don’t know everything … so, then you came here today and I feel … well, obviously you’ve been thinking about things over Christmas, and for some reason, now I feel that with you … well, I can be me.  I am sure that sounds scatty, sorry.”

“No, Ana, not at all.  I like your nose ring.”  She realised that was the truth too.  “I am beginning to feel the same, that, I can be me; the real me, not the me I am told to be or people are trying to make me.  I think I have been listening to them and even more than that, taking on their ideas - for far too long.”

“You don’t have to apologise for that, to anyone.  It’s easy to get scared; go along with what’s easy.”  Ana observed.

“Yes, but then you find it’s sapping the real you until you become someone else.”  Jessica laughed.

“What is it?”

“I didn’t mean to come here and start on some philosophical discussion.”

“Don’t worry about it.  I like chatting with you.  I think we should spend more time together, what do you think?”

Jessica noted that Ana was looking at her a little more intently now.  She felt a little guilty that she had ‘inside knowledge’ about why that might be.  However, as she thought through spending more time with Ana, that felt good to her.  In seconds she found herself wondering what the skin of Ana’s shoulders would feel like to touch.

“Yes, I think that is a good idea.  I want to ask you something first.”

“Okay.”  Anabelle sounded hesitant.

“Ana, are you a lesbian?”

Anabelle face went bright red in seconds.

“Erm … yes.”  Anabelle confessed.  “Yes, I am.  I’ve only had one girlfriend though.  Is that a problem?”  She looked worried that her answer would scare Jessica off, even from simply being a friend.

“Are you still seeing her?”

“No, she went travelling, we broke up over a year ago.”

“Good.”  Jessica said, surprised at how confident she sounded in all this.  “Look, I’ve never been out with a girl, a woman, but you know … you and me.”

“Are you asking me out?”  Anabelle asked excitedly.

“Yes … I think … yes, yes, I think we should have a relationship.  Sorry that makes it sound serious.  I think you are beautiful; I realise now that well … I think of you in ways that … well, get me excited, turned on, and I just like being with you so … shall we give it a go?  It’s not a marriage proposal …”

“As if that was possible.”  Anabelle snorted as if exasperated by that fact.

“It will come, I know.”  Jessica responded confidently.  “No, sorry, I am just saying, I don’t want to come over all heavy.  This is my first time, but I have a feeling it’s right.”

“I agree, girlfriend.”  Anabelle said softly.

Anabelle came over to the bed and sat down by Jessica.  Jessica felt a little dizzy and was aware that her heart was thumping.  Yet, she realised that this was an excitement about what was happening; also a relief that finally she had got here – a pressure that she recognised now probably long predated Ana’s arrival from the future.  Anabelle gently put her hand on Jessica’s cheek before leaning in, gently brushing lips with her own.  Then, with growing passion, they kissed more deeply.  As Anabelle’s breasts pressed against her own, and Jessica began to explore her new lover’s body with her hands, she knew that however peculiar the event that had brought her here; whatever the tweaks had been made to her outlook, these had been precisely right.

Looking back, Jessica was not really clear what happened.  She had got hotter and took that as a sign what she was doing was right.  She guessed that as two adults, sustained kissing was likely to lead on to more and she soon found herself out of her top and then her jeans and then it seemed natural to be under the duvet in the narrow bed, its width forcing their bodies against each other’s.  It became timeless, Jessica was simply aware of kisses and touches, of her breasts becoming so excited and then her pussy following along. 

Tentatively, running her hands over Ana’s smooth skin, Jessica reached down to her lover’s sex, which was hot and wet.  She knew what she would like and so did it to Ana.  Her smiles and her little moans, suggested Jessica was right.  Then she opened up herself, spreading her legs and giggling as Ana’s fingers began stroking then dipping into her sex.  Jez welcomed them though finding it hard to cope with the bursts of so delicious pleasured that they fired into her.  Her clit was almost too excited to be touched, but she knew this was going to be the first time of many sessions with Ana and that her body would grow accustomed; grow to need, lesbian sex.

Ana came with long moans and a shuddering; a flickering of her eyes and herself almost cast off the bed in abandon.  For Jez it was different, a shorter but intense shot of pleasure which drew her body taut and then let it slide into a cloud of bliss.  In that moment, Jez felt she had fulfilled something.  Not only had she managed to get herself a girlfriend, she had pleasured and been pleasured by her.  From now on, she could never say she had not had sex with a woman.  She was a lesbian after all, she thought proudly, and no-one was going to change that.

The couple lay quietly until it was black in the room.  Laughing, Ana got up and pulled the curtains before putting on the light.  Jez sat up in bed watching as her lover dressed.  Then Ana brought her clothes over to her.  Jez stood and let Ana help dress her, putting her back into her bra and panties, pull on her top and slide up her jeans.  In turn Jez brushed Ana’s hair, loving this ability to exist in each other’s spaces.  There was something here much more than simply sex, Jez realised, there was being in the same point of existence with another; being that comfortable with them that it was no intrusion.  That, she recognised, was something truly special and she knew she was lucky to have found it at this stage of her life.

“Hungry?”  Ana asked.

Jez nodded.  “Let’s eat out.”

“I thought we’d try that when we got back.”

The pair of them laughed in a way that might have sounded youthful but spoke of their new maturity.  Jez realised she had only begun to explore the big, wonderful world of sex with a woman and the thought of being between Ana’s thighs, licking at her moist lips, made her shudder with anticipation.  Soon they were out and on their way to the Students’ Union building, holding hands.  Perhaps in some places, Jez reflected, people would look askance at that, but this was a university, just into the twenty-first century.  As she walked with her girlfriend on their first kind of date, Jez felt certain it was going to be an excellent century for the both of them.